I’m a very sarcastic person. Can’t help it. And if my children are any indication, sarcasm is genetic. Or we wouldn’t have conversations like this one:
Me: I know X girlfriend has much older sisters and I don’t want you drinking alcohol or smoking just because they do it.
My 14-year-old daughter: I won’t. X girlfriend and I will be doing Heroine instead.
And later that night when I call to wish her a Happy New Year:
Me: Is that a boy I hear in the background?
My dtr: It’s only X boy and he hates me.
In the background – a male voice: I only hate you because you won’t move over on the bed.
Me: Bed? What bed? The name X boy and the word bed should never be used together in the same sentence. What are you and X boy doing in a bed?
My dtr: We’re having sex, mom. With X girlfriend here and her mother right down the hall.
Me: Get your stuff together, daddy will be there in five minutes.
Okay, I know she’s kidding, but hearing some of the stuff that comes out of my daughter’s mouth gives me the absolute chills – especially over the phone where I can’t see her facial expression and must rely solely on her tone.
So what about you? Do your children ever shoot off sarcasm that makes you do a double take to see if they’re serious? And how do you handle it?